EXT. TATOOINE - DESERT
Jundland, or "No Man's Land", where the rugged desert mesas meet the foreboding dune sea. The two helpless astro-robots kick up clouds of sand as they leave the lifepod and clumsily work their way across the desert wasteland. The lifepod in the distance rests half buried in the sand.
Threepio: How did I get into this mess? I really don't know how. We seem to be made to suffer. It's our lot in life.
Artoo answers with beeping sounds.
Threepio: I've got to rest before I fall apart. My joints are almost frozen.
Artoo continues to respond with beeping sounds.
Threepio: What a desolate place this is.
Suddenly Artoo whistles, makes a sharp right turn and starts off in the direction of the rocky desert mesas. Threepio stops and yells at him.
Threepio: Where are you going?
A stream of electronic noises pours forth from the small robot.
Threepio: Well, I'm not going that way. It's much too rocky. This way is much easier.
Artoo counters with a long whistle.
Threepio: What makes you think there are settlements over there?
Artoo continues to make beeping sounds.
Threepio: Don't get technical with me.
Artoo continues to make beeping sounds.
Threepio: What mission? What are you talking about? I've had just about enough of you! Go that way! You'll be malfunctioning within a day, you nearsighted scrap pile!
Threepio gives the little robot a kick and starts off in the direction of the vast dune sea.
Threepio: And don't let me catch you following me begging for help, because you won't get it.
Artoo's reply is a rather rude sound. He turns and trudges off in the direction of the towering mesas.
Threepio: No more adventures. I'm not going that way.
Artoo beeps to himself as he makes his way toward the distant mountains.
EXT. TATOOINE - DUNE SEA
Threepio, hot and tired, struggles up over the ridge of a dune: only to find more dunes, which seem to go on for endless miles. He looks back in the direction of the now distant rock mesas.
Threepio: That malfunctioning little twerp. This is all his fault! He tricked me into going this way, but he'll do no better.
In a huff of anger and frustration, Threepio knocks the sand from his joints. His plight seems hopeless, when a glint of reflected light in the distance reveals an object moving towards him.
Threepio: Wait, what's that? A transport! I'm saved!
The bronze android waves frantically and yells at the approaching transport.
Threepio: Over here! Help! Please, help!