Ranking Rebels: 10 Highlights from “Idiot’s Array”

Enter the puffer pig...and a smooth-talking scoundrel.

What do you do when you have more thoughts about Star Wars Rebels than you know what to do with? Make a list of your favorite moments — in no particular order, because that might fry your circuits. Welcome to Ranking Rebels.

Lando Calrissian is the smoothest talker in the galaxy, so his first appearance on Star Wars Rebels is already one of my favorite things. “Idiot’s Array,” the ninth episode of Season One, has a lot of great moments — and a really useful tray!

Here are my 10 favorite moments from the episode!


1. You gotta know when to fold ‘em.

Zeb and Kanan may not know Lando’s playing them, but any good poker player knows you don’t bet what you can’t afford to lose — even if you have Sabacc. But Kanan’s “You can’t bet Chopper!” turns into “Go for it” faster than lightspeed and, while Chopper knows something’s fishy, Threepio’s right. No one ever listens to a droid. You have to admit, Lando’s good.


2. Lando, you young smoothie.

Lando’s introduction to the rest of the crew goes about how you’d expect, considering he now owns Chopper and the Ghost crew is doing a job for him. Hera doesn’t like being put in the position of accepting because Kanan lost a bet without knowing the terms, so she does a little negotiation. Kanan knows he’s in the doghouse and Lando, both charming Hera while explaining what an “entrepreneur” is, isn’t helping.


3. Yay James Hong!

The second Azmorigan spoke, I clapped in glee. James Hong is a national treasure and hearing the man who’s brought so many amazing characters to life (including on The Clone Wars) is as delightful as Azmorigan is disgusting.


4. First, you lose Chopper, now Hera.

Talk about not being able to catch a break! Kanan ends up back on the Ghost without his captain and now Sabine’s scolding him. Lando’s got everyone all discombobulated, and he seems to be getting exactly what he wants.


5. That really was a useful tray!

We’ve never seen Hera play up her womanly wiles, but she sure does have them. She doesn’t need a skimpy outfit when she has those eyes, that voice, and…that tray. Her big eyes and promising smile not only lead to an Azmorigan knockout, but Lando takes a punch to the gut that knocks the smooth right out of him.


6. What’s in the box?  

Telling Zeb and Ezra not to look inside a closed box is pretty much pointless, so next thing you know…hello, puffer pig! Why do they call it a puffer pig? We definitely find out when we end up with a puffer pig barricade that makes everything more…interesting.


7. “Cloud cover.”  “What?”  “Find some.”

Those three lines may be my favorite of the series. With their ship exposed, Kanan and Hera are separated by the puffer pig and Kanan’s gotta fly the Ghost. The fact that these two have history and a rapport is pretty much what saves the day.


8. Up, up in the air with my beautiful puffer pig ballooooooon.

How can you not love this firefight? It’s one big game of “who’s got the upper hand” with lots of shooting, a flying beach ball puffer pig, Chopper stealing the fuel, and every member of the crew doing what they do best — work together to get it done.


9. Mine doesn’t do that.

Not only do we get an awesome payoff on Ezra’s lightsaber design from the last episode, but the recurring “Mine doesn’t do that” meme is so much fun.


10. A gambler never shows his cards.

He may be one of the smoothest scoundrels in the galaxy, but Lando Calrissian ends up owing our rebels a favor and they have his fuel as payment —  because of Chopper. Talk about a poker face!

Those were my moments for this episode. Tell me what your favorites were in the comments and may the Force be with you!

Geek Girl Diva is a longtime Star Wars fan and a diehard Rebels lover. She also thinks Poe Dameron’s hair has magical properties.

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